– for Cynthia

When You came to me

so many years ago

in that silent frozen place

terror

drew me quickly away

without time to think

the enemy turned me from You

and led me

back into the night

the nothingness of reaching

for bottles

for containers

for confections

for men…

how sad You must have felt

as You watched me run away

my self-will

thinking it was winning

spinning me from

Your Presence

into the never-ending chasm of despair…

then today

so many me(s) later

You come to me again

through the Body united…

still frightened by

Your Breath

in my ear

still wondering

if its real

and staying anyway

in spite of the fear

in spite of the lies

in spite of myself

trusting in the guidance

of the Body united,

and then blessed in peaceful rest…

You, my dear Lord, are always welcome.