“I always like to look on the optimistic side of life, but I am realistic enough to know that life is a complex matter.”
– Walt Disney

Many years ago, I was presented with the idea of writing a gratitude list every day. It was suggested that if I ended each day by listing five things on paper that I was grateful for, and why I was grateful for them, that my attitude about life would change. Amazingly, I followed the suggestion on a pretty regular basis and over the past 19 years, my attitude about life has changed significantly for the better. I see just about everything differently because of it.

However, Walt Disney’s cautionary quote above is true. While I do focus daily on things for which I am grateful, I also recognize that life is hard. It does not matter who you are, how much money you have, or how successful you are – there are going to be difficult moments in life. Those difficult moments may only last for an hour or a day, but sometimes they will last for a season with an unknown end. The important piece of gratitude is holding on to it during those difficult moments. This is not always easy. There are times when the complexity of our lives can be so dark and confusing that it feels impossible to see any light. But, there truly is always something to be grateful for!

When I was facing bi-lateral mastectomy surgery, my mind was in a dark place. About to turn 46-years-old the week after my surgery date, I was a relatively young woman to be experiencing that type of loss. Because my husband and I had been together for over ten years, my rational mind knew he loved me for me and not my body; but there was still a voice that told me he would not be able to love me the same without my breasts. That was when, sitting in the doctor’s office, my husband looked at me and said, “Jess, I really don’t care if you have boobs or not. I only care that you’re alive.” What he said was exactly what I needed to hear. And, while I didn’t realize the enormity of what he said in that moment, I do now. The voice that told me he wouldn’t love me the same without my breasts was actually right. His love for me grew stronger because of the cancer! Would any of that have happened if I had not been spending days and weeks and years compiling gratitude lists? Probably. Would I have noticed any of it if that daily gratitude had not trained my brain to see things differently? Probably not!

Finding balance in seeing life realistically – the good and the not-so-good – is the only way to go. As I accept struggles instead of fighting them, I free myself to see what might actually be good about them. And, as I make a point of appreciating specific things each day, an attitude of gratitude eventually becomes a way of life.

What are you grateful for today?

Happy Birthday in Heaven, Walt Disney! Thank you for Mickey Mouse!